Princess Parade

Gracie, Faith, Aryna, and Cambry got all dolled up at our mall today for the Princess Parade. Disney on Ice is coming to town (we have a date planned!), so in honor of that, local hairstylists and make-up artists made over the girls for their very own parade around the mall. Gracie loved getting her make-up and hair done! She is such the prissy one...she has already asked if she can wear her crown to church tomorrow. Faith lounged in the stroller eating chicken...but she was fashionably attired in her white shiny gown!

To do or not to do: gymnastics

Tuesday, Jaymie and I got together to make baby shower invitations for a friend. While we are very creative, we tend to take an abnormally long time to complete any project. So, we are not finished (when we finish, I will think about uploading a picture of them for you). However, while they were at my house, Gracie realized (which has been happening over the last week or so) that all of her friends are in gymnastics, and she is not. So she asked if she could go too. I, being the wonderful Mama that I am, said "Ask your Daddy". There IS a reason behind this. I have been feeling here lately that while I LOVE homeschooling her, and I really like the content of what she is learning, I am taking away the "fun" part of school. You know, the recess, the giggles, the best new friends. So, we had decided previously that we did NOT want to spend the money on gymnastics because it was a class full of the kids she already goes to church with. But I just couldn't say no to her again. I just couldn't! When Cameron asked me why I didn't just tell her no, I told him this. I think, in true man fashion, he didn't get it. I then told him that if we could pay the $30 annual fee then I would pay the $10 a week from my spending money. He agreed, then told Gracie she could go try it out, thus giving him all the fun parent credit! I told him later that totally wasn't fair, because he always ends up the "cool" parent. He argued that he didn't mean for that to happen, that Graice ASKED him and he had to answer. I got over it. No biggie. I AM the cool parent. :) hehehe Seriously though, she loved gymnastics and listened really well to her teacher. So, I think we will just bite down and pay the dumb $40 a month for her pure pleasure. By the way, Cam said he didn't expect me to use my spending money...we will add it to the budget. Yay! What a great man he is.

After all that activity, I went to Bunco and left the girls (and Cambry and Caden) with Cameron for a couple hours. The girls were beat that evening, and this is what happened...

Mixed Bathing

Ellie and her intended took their first bath together last night. We have decided to go the old fashioned route and choose her husband way ahead of time. hehehe This is my best friend, Jaymie's, son, Wyatt (he is 13 days younger). Aren't they just precious!!

We were trying to get some little hiney shots, but they would NOT cooperate!

Ellie is constantly "getting" Wyatt; he hates it!!

Challenge

I got an email this morning, one I am sure you have all read. A little boy wets his pants and is humiliated and prays that the Lord help him before someone finds out. Along comes a little girl who "accidentally" trips and dumps water all over him. Later, the little boys says to the girl, "you did that on purpose didn't you?" to which she replies, "I wet my pants before too". I have read this a dozen times, but for some reason this morning I was moved. It is so often that we fail to help someone because we think of what will happen to us instead of how MUCH it will help the other person. I just wanted to share this and encourage you to not only help someone today, but to be selfless. I feel that Jesus wants that of us. He wants us to put ourselves last even though it is so hard to do! So I am going to start today. And start over tomorrow. And the next day until it becomes natural...

One more thing. Did you catch that part where the little boy prayed? He asked Jesus to help him AFTER he wet his pants. Why don't we have that kind of faith? He believed that the Lord could get him out his predicament. The other day, Faith was praying, and she thanked Jesus for letting us scrapbook. I thought it was so cute! Then I started to think about it, and I wondered why it never crossed my mind to thank Him for allowing me the time to do my hobby. Is it really any wonder why He wants us to be as little children?

Eek!!

I just realized that I have not posted since Monday. What have I been doing, you may ask, that I haven't noticed? Well, that is a good question! We have had school daily with only minor setbacks. Gracie is learning to add this week. HOW do you explain to a 5 year old that when you add you count up? hehehe She is getting the hang of it. We are also learning about Moses and the Pharaoh and the Israelites. That means we have been singing "Oh baby, let my people go. huh!" complete with motions. Bet you wish you could see and hear that don't ya?!

Faith decided to pick up Ellie and take her outside. Only she dropped/rammed her face into the brick hearth. She has a big ol' scrape on her nose much like the one Faith had on her nose the first time she met Ellie. It looks awful! Makes me wonder if Ellie is going to be as...challenging...as Faith is. We should be pros at warding off the many shenanigans by then. Right? Tell me I'm right and that it will get easier...












Bryan left for Ukraine tonight with my Grandad. They are going to go tell the people about Jesus and how He loves them. How awesome! Bryan will get to tell the little kids in the orphanages Bible stories and hopefully show them the Light and a way to have eternal life. Anyway, on our way back from the airport, Gracie told me that I sure would miss her when she was grown up (I was thinking, gee...what did I do?). She continued by telling me that she was going to live in Paris when she grows up. I asked what in the world she would do there, and she replied, "I am going to be a babysitter!". Hmmmmm... I told her she doesn't know how to speak French, and she said "Bonjour!". How was I supposed to sit there and not die laughing?!!

How Did That Get So Filthy??

I dumped the toy box and the play kitchen onto the floor with all the contents of the closet and drawers in the playroom. Why is it necessary to make a BIGGER mess in order to clean? I felt that it was time to disinfect all the toys. I am not quite sure when the last time was that I did this (I know! Horrible!), but I just felt this urge to do it. I was shocked at how many Clorox wipes it took and what color the used wipes were! It was really gross. But now, the playroom has a sparkle to it and everything is safe to suck and chew on. I even located most of the dvds...if anyone has an extra Peter Pan, Mrs. Pattycake, or Barbie (one of the thousand they make), I claim it!!

Getting Real

I told you all a while back that I wanted to share deeper things with you, and open myself up more to you. I realized that I posted yesterday and did not mention how the day was going in regards to it being "that day". So I thought I would take a step out of my comfort zone and share.

Since the day Chloe died, I have not been able to sleep past 7:00. On that day, I fed her around 6:30, she died sometime around 7:20, and I found her around 9:00. I will always wonder if I could have prevented it if only I would have stayed up after that feeding. I know, realistically, I could not have prevented it, but maybe I would have seen her sooner, and spared myself from having to see her blue and lifeless. So this day, Ellie woke me up at 6:58, and again at 7:15. Not sure why this always happens, but it does. I got up, made some coffee, and sat down to read my Bible. A couple weeks ago, I found the journal I had written in after Chloe died. It was powerful, to say the least. I read some of the scriptures that helped me then, and then I wrote some more about how I am feeling now. I cannot adequately describe to you the emotions that I go through. I want her here so badly, to see what she would look like, to see if her hair would still be curly, to hold her one more time. But at the same time, I wonder how different my life would be if she WERE here. Would I have three other daughters? Would we be where we are today? It is almost like being pulled in two different directions at the same time. So, like I do every year, I thank the Lord that I don't have to choose. I thank Him for giving me almost four beautiful months with her. I thank Him for giving me the husband that He did who never casts blame or wonders what I did to his little girl. I thank Him for allowing her short life to make such an impact on other people. I thank Him for His plentiful blessings and for how He makes ALL things beautiful. I thank Him for holding her until I get there to see her again. I am so thankful on this day...while at the same time, so sad.

On a happy note, I got flowers today! Bryan and Shanna almost always send flowers, and Cam got me some of the most fragrant pink roses I have ever smelled. My best friend sent me a card a day since Wednesday, I got a great E-card that made me cry, and the posts here on my blog were fantastic. I feel so very loved!

This next part is not intended for anyone at all, but something I didn't realize until I was the person people were afraid to talk to. Do not be afraid to say something on a day that you know is hard for someone. While I understand that it is awkward at best, something said, even if it is the wrong something, is better than nothing said at all. And, please, please never, ever say that it is just as hard or harder for you. Don't compare the event with one of your own. Let them have this day to grieve for themselves. Let them do it their own way, and forgive the apparent rudeness, because I promise you, I never realize I am rude. I am just trying my best to cope and make it through.

Love to you all, and thank you so much for the prayers. I felt His arms and embrace today!

School Fun

Today after we had school, we painted pumpkins (we also decorated the house for Fall this week, so the pumpklins fit in with our "theme"). This was the reward for a great week of homeschooling. Gracie is learning new things by leaps and bounds, and as her Mama, it is so neat to get to be an active part of the process! Here are some fun pics of our grand crafting experience.

Go! Daddy! Go!

Cameron plays on our church league football team, and their first game was last night. The girls "had" to wear cheerleading suits! So cute they are. Even cuter that they played on the playground instead of watching the game...but really, who could blame them. The park was AWESOME!! It had rained earlier in the day though, so the slides were wet. Faith went down, got soaked, and sat down to get naked. HOW do you teach your kids to keep their clothes on!!! Holy Cow! I spend more time re-dressing them than any mother should have to! Either that, or getting upset because Faith is on her twelfth outfit of the day (with the previous 11 in the hamper). I also showed Gracie how rocks write on concrete (you know, those "special" rocks). I cannot believe we have never done that! How unfortunate and sheltered my girls are!! :)

This week in 2001...

Let me start with yesterday. I was on an emotional roller coaster with Cameron being gone. I got to church around 8:35 ish and promptly turned into a puddle of tears. Every little thing made me well up. In Sunday School I was searching the room for something, anything, to take my mind off of the lesson...we were talking about how God puts certain events in our lives to build our faith. Then my eyes settled on the calendar, and I realized that this week, for the first time in 6 years, the DAYS were the same as they were the week Chloe died. I can tell you with an uncanny accuracy exactly what I was doing and what was going on that whole week. Mix that in with the emotions of the Twin Tower Attacks, and I am a basket case!
While losing Chloe was horrific, the memories I hold of her are so sweet. I have to admit though, that the memories of her birth are much more pleasant than the ones that will pop up in my mind on Firday. That is the hardest day of the year for me...as you all probably know, I am visual, and I can recall things in detail that have happened in the past. That day, those memories, are things that a mother NEVER wants to re-live or see again. So...keep us in your prayers this week...we need it so much more than you can imagine...

Uh-Oh

Well, I am home with just Ellie, and she is asleep, and I can't seem to stop bidding on things on Ebay...I have won some new Birkenstocks (that makes pair #5 I believe). They are cute, but I didn't NEED them...I didn't actually think I would win, but when I did, I immediately went to another pair of shoes and started to bid on those! I realized what I was doing and X'd out with only 3 minutes left in the auction. WHY did I do that! I really wanted that pair! It is like reverse buyers remorse. I was upset that I DIDN'T buy them instead of upset that I did. Hello. My name is Stephanie, and I am a shopoholic. Oh! Did I mention the cute new things I ordered for the girls from the big sale at Gymboree? Oh this will be a FUN mail week!!

New Picture

There isn't anything new to tell you about other than this has been a MUCH MUCH better day around here. This is Ellie's 9 month picture...you can see the little sign in the background just a bit...I have taken her picture every month with this sign so that I can see how she grew from month to month. It was something I wanted to do with each of our children, but for some reason it didn't happen. I haven't missed a month with Ellie! Yay! Maybe when she turns One I will post all 12 pictures...that would be kind of neat...

On to fun news, I am working feverishly to win a new Vera Bradley Miller bag to put all of my homechool supplies in (so we can have school away from home, and I can still be semi-organized). I don't NEED one, but I would love to have one...I lost an auction on Ebay this morning by $1!! Rats! I am still trying to figure out which color I like the most...your opinions will be welcomed!! I am leaning towards either Peacock or Java Blue...

One of THOSE days

Today was one of those mornings that you wake up and wonder why the world decided to poo on your head. Faith woke up grumpy & whiny and has yet to snap out of it. Gracie was pouty. Cam could do nothing right, and Ellie just wanted to nurse. I was trying to "fix" my attitude so I made some coffee and sat down to read my daily devotion. Even that didn't really apply! It was good for someone, but I really don't need encouragement on my weight loss journey. School took twice as long as usual (but we finished!) Then came the grocery store. WHY did I go there? I should have stayed home and made everybody take a nap (myself included). The choice I made at 7:15 this morning to be annoyed has ruined my day. It is my fault, I admit it. I am unsure how I could have been chipper, but I will take responsibility. So now I am working on how to put some God love in my voice and actions and make this a fun remainder of the day. Maybe I should make something gooey and chocolate....

Just to Clarify...

Okay. Cam has passed all exams to be a licensed realtor, but he will not, however, be "practicing" in the real estate world full-time. He got the license to help out in the real estate investing that he and Bryan do for a living. So, he may at times, sell a house to a friend or for a friend, but he will not actually be selling houses like a traditional realtor. He will be buying and selling houses for investment reasons. Does this help? I am sorry. I just assumed that everyone knew what he and Bryan are up to (I KNOW we are not supposed to assume things...). I also know that no one can REALLY know what he and Bryan are up to. Those little rascals!